Trump on Fox a day after being relieved of office

 I asked the Google search bar:

Write a funny story about Donald Trump the day after being relieved of office.  He is angry, and is talking to a formerly sympathetic Fox News reporter.

Here's the response:

The morning sun blazed over the Mar-a-Lago patio, but the mood at the breakfast table was pure thunder. Donald Trump sat aggressively stabbing a stack of pancakes, his red tie draped over his shoulder to avoid the maple syrup. Across from him sat a Fox News reporter, furiously adjusting her earpiece while trying to maintain her trademark sympathetic nod.
"It’s a disaster, okay? A total, complete catastrophe for the ratings," Trump said, pointing his fork at her. "One day out of Washington, and the numbers are completely tanking. Deep state. Deep state room service, too—look at this bacon. Limp. Very low energy bacon. I told them I wanted it crispy, like the economy under my administration. The greatest economy in human history, everyone knows it."
The reporter leaned forward, her face contorted into an expression of profound, tragic grief. "Mr. Trump, the entire nation is weeping. Our switchboards are lighting up with patriots who simply cannot process a world where you aren't at the presidential podium. But tell us, how are you coping with this incredibly unfair transition?"
"I’m not coping, I’m winning," Trump snapped, leaning into the microphone. "They think they relieved me of duty? Radical left thugs. I relieved them. I looked at Washington and I said, 'You know what? The architecture is very dated. Too much marble, not enough gold.' So I walked away. But let me tell you, the fake news media is dying without me. They have nothing to talk about. Now they're covering potholes. Potholes! Can you believe it? Nobody cares about potholes unless I’m filling them with the most beautiful, luxurious cement you’ve ever seen."
The reporter sighed heavily, dabbing a non-existent tear from her eye. "It truly is the end of an golden era. But the question on everyone's minds, sir... what is the next step for the movement?"
Trump leaned back, crossing his arms and squinting out toward the golf course. "We’re doing a golf tournament. A tremendous tournament. The Trump Post-Presidency Invitational. Only the best people. And if the club champions from the other courses try to play? We won't let them. We'll challenge the results. We have a lot of evidence that their handicaps are totally rigged."

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